A Cat’s Thoughts

Dear lord what are you doing to me. OK please stop petting me. No I said stop not keep on petting me! GOD what is your problem. Ok I am sorry you had a bad day but please stop ripping my fur off. NO stop, stop, STOP!!!!!! Ok now your crying, wow! Yeah get your tears all over my fur because I want all of your sticky, nasty, gross, and salty tears all over my nice fur. Ewww you got snot all over me gross! Thank –you, you finally stopped crying. Ok wait where are taking me no stop no I don’t want a bath NNNNNOOOOOOOO!!! SPLOOSH!! Great thanks a lot what I great pet owner you are. Don’t you know cats HATE water. You notice I can report you. If only I could figure out how to use the phone but besides that I still could. Stop rubbing that icky stuff in my fur. OUCH, OUCH it stings it stings GET THAT STUFF OUT OF MY EYES! Help me somebody she is trying to kill me! RUNAWAY!!!!! I finally got away from her she is crazy and why was she giving me a bath. She is only 4 years old, which is a little young to be giving a cat a bath. HAHAHAHAHA she got in trouble! Yeah you better be crying after what you did to me. Oh no she is crying, not again! AAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

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